There’s a point when generosity
becomes self harm
when kindness cuts inwardly
bleeding us silently.
Where once upon a time
I lived all smiley sweet
and small
to get what I wanted
and fill in what I needed.
But, I don’t want to continue
spending myself away
pleasing and appeasing
allowing the cost of connection
to color my choices and
dictate my direction.
There’s a wanting to live
and lead from within
where pausing and sensing
Does this fit?
Does this feel right?
creates my own pace
and guides my next steps
even though the solution
is still unclear
and the destination
is still unformed.
Where each step
forward
brings me one step
back
to me.
- Lauren Taub Cohen
* This poem is heavily influenced by Inner Relationship Focusing's process. Thank you Ann Weiser Cornell and Barbara McGavin for creating IRF! And, thank you Dr. Helene Brenner for creating the phrase "self-orienting," which gives language to something I've recently begun to feel but couldn't quite express.
